Jaja’s Greek Mythology: Who Are The Olympians?

Jaja’s Greek Mythology: Who Are The Olympians?

Prologue

Let me tell you something… Remember that after the war and all that business with the Titans whose names you might not remember, that the gods started getting married and stuff? Well this page functions to tell you which gods are the god of what, their domain, strengths and other stuff like that. These gods are Ranked from Most Powerful to the Less Strong gods. I will also tell you whether I like him or not…

Firstly, let me tell you that they are referred to as Olympians cause they live in Mount Olympus which I have mentioned in the last page, like we are, you know… Indonesians?

A Simple Guide To This Page:

  • Powers: These are the powers of the God/Goddess, most of them can shape-shift, and radiate power, but these are those that are exclusive to them
  • Domain: These are the areas they rule, or the subjects they do best on
  • Symbol: Their symbol… Basically if they bring a flag, this is the color or things they have in their flag
  • Sacred Animal: Animals that they see as an image of themselves…
  • Personality: This is for their personality, and how they behave
  • Known Relics/Weapons: This is usually the items they hold. This can be the weapon or relic of the said god
  • How Was He/She Born?: First thing that happens after they are born… May include how hard is it to give birth for them, and their parents
  • Official Spouse: Their official partner in “Till Death Do Us Part” But well, they cheat a lot, so there’s that
  • Daily Activities: Things they do in your average episode of Greek Mythology, which isn’t that average
  • One Sentence Philosophy: A joke I make regarding their personalities… If it’s funny leave a comment!
  • Do I Like Him/Her?: My thoughts on the god/goddess.. just a personal opinion

Zeus, The King Of The Universe

A statue of Zeus, complete with his Thunder Bolt
  • Powers: Lightning Bolts, Brewing Storms, and some more “Shocking” stuff, such as shape-shifting!
  • Domain: He is the God of The Sky, Thunderbolts, Storms, and he’s also King of Olympus.
  • Symbol: A Lightning Bolt
  • Sacred Animal: Eagles, cause those things fly on his domain
  • Personality: Stern, and Proud. You do not want to mess with his ego. Since he is king of the universe, he also has the right to kill you if he doesn’t like you, and no one can forbid you from doing that.
  • Known Relics/Weapons: Zeus’s Bolt, the Shield Aegis, but that’s… a bit tricky… refer to Athena down below.
  • How Was He Born?: OK, well read here first, you might want to refer to that
  • Official Spouse: Hera, Goddess Of Marriage… but he does cheat on her… a lot… Which is weird, since Hera is the Goddess Of Marriage, and is VERY loyal to Zeus…
  • Daily Activities:
    • He rules over mortals and gods with high expectations!
    • He also decides how law is supposed to be passed and stuff, since in Greece kings decide punishment, and who is guilty or innocent..
    • Oh, and he finds mortal women for him to date and cheat on his wife on…
    • Oh, and the cream of the crop… Punishing mortals for not much of a reason.
  • One Sentence Philosophy: It is A King’s Job To Make Sure To Rule Without Getting Distrac… OH LOOK! A PRETTY GIRL!
  • Do I Like Him?: NO! there is nothing awesome with a King who doesn’t do his job properly, In fact to make things worse, Zeus isn’t loyal at all to his wife, he doesn’t even have any swag to make up for that. Sure, he’s king… Is he smart? Not really… There you go… Is he powerful? Ok, yeah he is, but… quoting Spider-man, With Great Power Comes Great Responsibility, and Zeus has no responsibility, almost at all.

Poseidon, God Of The Sea

Poseidon, Holding His Trident
  • Powers: The ability to manipulate water, and create Earthquakes, also he can communicate with any sea life!
  • Domain: He’s The God Of the Sea
  • Symbol: The Trident
  • Sacred Animal: Horses! He made them
  • Personality: A Stern but Laid-back King. Oh and he also gets Saltier than the Sea Waters cause he rarely gets what he wants (apart from Women), problem is Poseidon wants too much… He seems to get jealous very easily.
  • Known Relics/Weapons: Poseidon’s Trident
  • How Was He Born?: He got eaten… but see Zeus
  • Official Spouse: Amphitrite, a Sea Nymph, but he also cheats on her…
  • Daily Activities:
    • Swimming around the ocean
    • Finding pretty mortals that walk near the sea
    • Commanding sea creatures to do as he pleases,
    • Trying his best to get what he wants.
    • Oh, and drowning people who forgot to sacrifice to him, tossing islands with Earthquakes each time he doesn’t get what he wants. (If you think a baby’s Tantrum is bad, you don’t know Poseidon’s tantrum…)
  • One Sentence Philosophy: I’m saltier than the sea
  • Do I Like Him?: Nah, he sucks, firstly, he has rage issues… and with his trident, he can toss islands and drown people when things don’t go his way, and secondly, with women, he’s probably cheated on his wife more than Zeus because at least Zeus’s wife is mad at him, and he has a week of redeeming himself and stuff, Amphitrite doesn’t get mad, so… err Poseidon can cheat on her without a single thought…

Hades, God Of The Dead

Hades With His Pet 3 Headed Dog
  • Powers: He rules the dead… There is a LOT of dead people.
  • Domain: He’s the God of The Dead, and God Of The Underworld
  • Symbol: Scepter
  • Sacred Animal: The Screech Owls cause… I got nothing… Maybe those are the scariest Owls
  • Personality: Bitter… He is an estranged person to the other gods, and he never gets any visits. He gets pretty bitter about it, and often times, he can’t really fuss about his luck, he just deals with it. At least he is grateful with what he has, unlike Zeus and Poseidon… also, By technicality, Hades isn’t an Olympian…
  • Known Relics/Weapons: Magneto’s Helmet… I mean… Helmet Of Darkness…
  • How Was He Born?: Same as Poseidon… He was born as a meal for his dad
  • Official Spouse: Persephone Goddess of Springtime… Oh, but he kidnapped her, and almost destroyed the entire population of mankind because of that… So there’s that… (but he doesn’t cheat on her that often, so that’s gratefulness for you!).
  • Daily Activities:
    • Watching dead people from his palace. ( Hades doesn’t really have too much activities, since most of his monster servants, or zombie servants do the job for him.)
    • He is rich, cause all the gold in the underground belongs to him, and he can hire anything he wants for free. If he is in the mood to have Piano Lessons? Bam! send Ghost Mozart to his palace!
    • So maybe… cause of the ever increasing population of the dead he gets richer every day, and access to less boring activities.
    • But probably he just stares at his monsters torturing the evil souls.
  • One Sentence Philosophy: I’m alive, but everything around me isn’t…
  • Do I Like Him?: Yeah I do… Despite all his weirdness, bitterness, and 1 star Reviews from people that visit the underworld and got out (Theseus and Hercules was some of them). He is a good guy… I mean, he doesn’t cheat on his wife (more than 2 times, later stories), and he hasn’t really punished a mortal for offending him, for lying to him? Sure! For cheating death? YEP, he does that. He’s a patient and grateful guy in a sense. (Okay, sure there is the kidnapping.. but hey, he’s lonely, cut him some slack)

Hera, Goddess Of Marriage

Hera, The Ancient Greece Equivalent Of Crazy Moms
  • Powers: Driving people crazy, making demigods suffer, shape-shifting, disguising herself (What’s the connection between this and marriage you might ask… I don’t know)
  • Domain: Marriage, Family Life, Motherhood, and most important of all… Making demigods and Zeus’s girlfriends suffer.
  • Symbol: A Peacock Feather
  • Sacred Animal: Cows, cause those things are motherly… I don’t really get this though, but if she insists, I wont cross her…
  • Personality: Firstly Hera has a HECK of an attitude. She basically has every possible method of making people annoyed, or sick of her. Also, when she gets offended, she’ll possibly find the worst indirect way of making you suffer (reminds me of some women in a bad mood). Hera does things pretty indirectly, but she is sneaky, and has lots of tricks to make someone suffer. Oh, and she is also a perfectionist.
  • Known Relics/Weapons: I’m not sure, Hera doesn’t have any cool weapons that I know of.
  • How Was She Born?:
    Unlike Hades and Poseidon and Zeus, there are some unmentioned things regarding this. Firstly, before she claimed her throne, she was sent to live with Uncle Oceanus by mother Rhea. Hera respected Oceanus not swaying to any women and pretty sea nymphs, and she felt she wants to have a husband that is just as loyal as Oceanus is to his wife. Hera decided she wants to claim her throne in Mount Olympus as the Goddess Of Marriage.
  • Official Spouse: Zeus…
  • Daily Activities:
    • Making Demigod sons of Zeus suffer
    • Finding Zeus’s latest girlfriends, and making sure they are in pain
    • Keeping the Olympian family intact by trying to resolve conflict.
    • You know, just your typical Goddess of Family life activities, making sure everyone in her family is perfect, and dumping those that aren’t
    • Oh and also, she does one thing right… she blesses newlyweds.
  • One Sentence Philosophy: So, that’s 1000 girlfriends of Zeus out of the way… 1000 to go!
  • Do I Like Her?: NOPE NOPE NOPE! She’s a perfectionist, and I already dislike women with too much of a temper, but really? Hera’s problem isn’t just her temper, but also her method of doing things, and as you might see below, those methods are totally not cool!

Demeter, Goddess of Agriculture

Demeter With This Month’s Harvest…
  • Powers: Making crops grow, or wither.
  • Domain: Plants, Growth, and Agriculture in general
  • Symbol: A Scythe, but the farming one… not the killing one
  • Sacred Animal: She doesn’t have one…
  • Personality: She’s pretty calm. She is overprotective of her daughter, Persephone, well even though she got kidnapped. She has some tantrum issues, and is very dangerous when mad. Demeter is a girl that’s well, she is in the middle, she’s not too scary like Hera, she’s not too calm either though. She enjoys nature, and plants as well. Although… She has her issues, such as her being overprotective, and some temper, but overall she’s a pretty good mom, sister, and Olympian.
  • Known Relics/Weapons: Her farming scythe
  • How Was She Born?: As a meal for Kronos
  • Official Spouse: She isn’t married to anyone, but she has some short relationships with a few mortals.
  • Daily Activities:
    • Making crops grow, giving humans food
    • Chilling by the fields, watching, and smelling plants
    • Teaching farming techniques to humans who sacrifice to her
    • Well, that one time her daughter got kidnapped, she made plants wither, and made sure no human gets to eat… Because that’s the less calm Demeter
  • One Sentence Philosophy: My daughter got kidnapped! NOBODY GETS TO EAT!
  • Do I Like Her? Hmm… I’ll stay neutral, for several reasons… One being her letting personal emotions cloud her judgement, but she’s also an overall peaceful and kind goddess, with not much wrong things for her to do. She just wants to protect all of her daughters.

Ares, God Of War

Ares, Ready for War!
  • Powers: His eyes infuriate anyone who stare onto them, He has strength and combat skills beyond compare.
  • Domain: He’s the God of War! and more stuff involving war.
  • Symbol: War Helmet, and Wild Boar
  • Sacred Animal: Wild Boar, cause those things rage without any reason… Like him!
  • Personality: He has anger issues, so… he kills people, and has an addiction to Warfare… He’s dumb in a sense… He kills people instead of talking to them, that’s a… straightforward method. He’s your typical brute. Oh, and remember Wonder Woman’s Ares? Yeah, Greek Mythology Ares isn’t as smart as that Ares. At least Wonder Woman Ares used wits… Real Ares probably won’t understand what “wits” mean.
  • Known Relics/Weapons: His Sword, His fire breathing horses (Bubi fears regular horses, and trust me, she’ll fear that more), His battle armor.
  • How Was He Born?: He was born to Hera and Zeus… As a baby, Ares broke his Father’s finger, so he got sent to a Mountain Nymph that ended up taking care of him. As a child… He learned to fight and nearly killed people… a lot of times. See, this is why you shouldn’t let Nanny’s parent your child… They’ll be like Ares!
  • Official Spouse: He doesn’t marry anyone but has lots of girlfriends. The most notable one is Aphrodite, the Goddess of Love.
  • Daily Activities:
    • Starting wars by staring at people
    • Fighting in those wars, while killing people…
    • He also spends time hurting people for no reason, especially those that offend him.
    • He also blesses people he likes with something called the Blessing Of Ares (again, the Greeks aren’t the most creative with names). Anyone blessed by him becomes invulnerable in combat.
  • One Sentence Philosophy: You think someone like Ares would have a philosophy? Nah… He’s a direct approach guy… “STAB! STAB! STAB!”.. Results are earned much faster
  • Do I Like Him?: NO! ! What do you think I am? I’m a thinker… Although he is cool and bad-ass, his coolness doesn’t beat out the fact he doesn’t think things through.

Athena, Goddess Of Wisdom

Athena, Complete With Battle Armor
  • Powers: The wisdom of ten thousand scholars, Unparalleled Strategies in the Art of War, enough to make Sun Tzu jealous.
  • Domain: She’s the Goddess of Warfare, (but the wise and strategy type, not the Ares kind.) Craft, and Wisdom
  • Symbol: Olive Trees, cause she made them…
  • Sacred Animal: Owls, cause the Greeks believe that Owls are the most wise animals, and their hoot-hoot sound at night are whispers of knowledge… OK… I won’t argue with that
  • Personality: She’s smart, but if you refer to some stories about Medusa, and Arachne, she doesn’t really use wisdom like her tagline states. She tries to use wisdom most of the times, but when I look at some things, she lets her personal emotions cloud her judgement that is supposed to have wisdom.
  • Known Relics/Weapons: Her Shield, Aegis. That shield also has Medusa’s head put in front of it, and if you know a bit about Medusa, staring onto Medusa’s eyes will turn you to stone.
  • How Was She Born?:
    This is a bit tricky… Remember Metis? No? Well, She’s the Titan Of Pure Thought, and natural law, Kronos’s sister… Anyways, Zeus married Metis before he married Hera, and Athena was born from those 2… BUT WAIT! See, A prophecy stated that Metis’s children will be wiser than his father, Zeus felt contested, so he swallowed Metis… (hang on, with Zeus’s wisdom any child will be wiser than him)But unfortunately for Zeus, Metis was already carrying Athena, and once born inside Zeus’s stomach, Athena dissolved herself onto pure thought… I don’t know how, she just did… She then got onto Zeus’s head, and gave Zeus a headache. The other gods wondered how it happened, so Hephaestus, The Blacksmith God broke open Zeus’s head, and BAM! Athena came out with full battle armor, as an adult.
  • Official Spouse: She’s an eternal maiden, she doesn’t plan on marrying or dating anyone, although there is that one time she has a son, but that’s err… tricky… so other times…
  • Daily Activities: I’m not sure about this, but if you read a lot about Athena, she enjoys…
    • Inventing new techniques to improve mankind. S
    • She also likes learning new things, and practicing her combat skills… Much better… unlike her brother Ares…
  • One Sentence Philosophy: I will use wisdom to judge everything… Unless if it’s personal!
  • Do I Like Her?: Hmm… I don’t like everything she does, because I still think that punishing people for bragging (Arachne) or punishing an innocent woman that is tricked by a god (Medusa) is definitely over the line. She should’ve been wise enough to not let her personal thoughts cloud her wisdom. On the other hand, she’s a very useful goddess for the development of humans in Greek mythology… So, I’ll stay neutral for her..

Aphrodite, Goddess Of Love

Aphrodite… Admiring Herself
  • Powers: She can make people fall in love with anyone… Anyone who looks at her will see the most beautiful woman in their imagination, literally.
  • Domain: Love, Beauty, and everything related to either one of those, except Marriage, that’s Hera’s domain.
  • Symbol: Doves, the Greeks believe of doves as messengers of love.
  • Sacred Animal: Doves, oh what a surprise, since her symbol is also that…
  • Personality: She’s… Insecure… No joke… She fears that one day someone will be prettier than her, and she often finds other men to comfort her. Good-looking men, since her husband is ugly. She gets jealous pretty quickly, and she often compares herself to other women. If even the Goddess of Beauty and Love can be insecure about some things, then… listen to that song… “Cause you are beautiful… No matter what they say, words can’t bring you down!” (or something like that.) Anyways, she also enjoys attention a lot, and enjoys making mortals suffer with her love magic… She thinks it’s funny…
  • Known Relics/Weapons: A magical Girdle (or belt), that makes people fall in love with her in an instant.
  • How Was She Born?: Remember Ouranos? If you don’t read this… yeah she’s born from some of Ouranos’s body parts and seafoam. When she got to land, she met the three goddesses that each represent the seasons, except Winter. They dressed her up, and took her to Olympus, and all of the male gods wanted to marry her in an instant cause she’s pretty. Those male gods, poor them. Oh, but Hera gave Aphrodite the worst looking god of them all, Hephaestus to marry Aphrodite. Cause if a handsome god like Zeus, Poseidon, or Ares marries her, they’d probably fight 24/7, and the earth is a battle field. Aphrodite has that effect on people…
  • Official Spouse: Hephaestus. But! She has no kids with him, and lots of kids with lots of other men, and the gods… Ares, Hermes, and Dionysus… Poor Hephaestus…
  • Daily Activities:
    • Staring at herself in a mirror…
    • Putting make up on…
    • Making mortals (and gods) fall in love with each other.
    • Although, she has a son named Eros (or you might know the Roman Name: Cupid better), to do the third part of her job when she is too busy staring at herself and wearing makeup.
    • Oh, she also enjoys getting prayers and sacrifices by making people fall in love with people that barely notice you. Blame her if you are still single!
  • One Sentence Philosophy: I’m the prettiest… RIGHT?
  • Do I Like Her?: Nope… She’s pretty, but look at that personality, and daily activities… Should be enough to give you an image of what she does, and well… No reason to like her.

Apollo, God Of Music

Apollo Striking A Pose
  • Powers: His voice is mesmerizing, His ability and wordplay is godly (of course, he’s a god), His ability to play music instruments are incomparable, and… well… just read the domain part cause this is going to be tricky, he’s the god of a gazillion things.
  • Domain: OK… Apollo is the God of… Music, Archery, Poetry, Prophecies, Art, Medicine, Plagues, The Sun, Protector Of Young Men, Cattle herding, and Anything Artistic.
  • Symbol: The Lyre, The Sun.
  • Sacred Animal: Hang on, he doesn’t have any… but He has a sacred plant known as the Laurel. Used for Wreaths, as a symbol for kings to show their glory, he’s got taste!
  • Personality: He… is a narcissistic person in a sense. He thinks he’s basically the most awesome guy that’s a symbol of perfection. But hang on, he isn’t entirely narcissistic. Apollo like I said, also has taste, he chooses the most artistic and graceful things for him to be interested on, which yes, includes Women. Apollo shows as much gracefulness and flair as he can. I don’t see much bad personalities from Apollo apart from the slight narcissism, and his ego. Well, his ego isn’t as high as Zeus, but i can assure you, he’s got LOADS of Ego. Oh and one more thing… Apollo craves to be in the spotlight. He’ll do whatever it takes to be the center of attention. Luckily he’s got lots of tools to accomplish that.
  • Known Relics/Weapons: The Sun Chariot, in which he rides the sun on, His Lyre, and The Most Important Thing… His Golden Bow!
  • How Was He Born?:
    OK… Firstly, remember Zeus’s habit of dating girls and leaving them? Well, Apollo’s dad is Zeus, and his mom? A titan named Leto, who is the Titan of motherhood. But hang on… Apollo’s birth is all forms of tragedy. Firstly, remember Hera? What’s her daily job? Oh yes, making any offspring and girlfriends of Zeus suffer. She hates Leto too much, because Leto is pregnant with twins… Hera’s curse to Leto is that Leto cannot give birth on any land with roots, which is every land… (well almost every land)The curse isn’t over yet, cause Hera must be in a VERY bad mood (those moms, their mood when it’s bad is SCARY)… Hera summoned a giant serpent called Python to make Leto’s life 10 times more miserable. So, when Leto was in labor at the 7th month of pregnancy, no land would accept her because of Hera’s curse. And oh look! A giant serpent is chasing her!Okay, so she ran around Greece with a giant snake on her tail, while in labor, and isn’t allowed to give birth. Wow, I totally respect her. So where did she give birth? Well luckily there is an island that has no roots, but is drifting around and has no solid location. You know, like Jules Verne’s Mysterious Island! So she swum there, and gave birth there, causing roots to grow there, (cause Greek Mythology demands such logic), and giving the island now known as Delos, a firm and solid location on the map

    .Apollo’s birth actually came second to his twin sister, but, he took the spotlight in an instant. He grew up immediately to the size of a 7 year old, and he sang a song that impressed every goddess that assisted Apollo’s birth, which is basically every goddess, except Hera. When he was 1 week old, he already grew up to the age of 19, cause he’s a god, he could do that… He slayed the snake Python with his golden bow, he used Python’s body, dumped it onto a cave, that created fumes used to “hear the words of the gods” in the center of Greece and called it the main source of prophecies in all of Greece! There’s Apollo’s story, so wait for his sister’s turn.

  • Official Spouse: He plans on staying a bachelor forever, and he wants to date around as much as he can, try out as many girls he can date. (Reminds me of John Mayer). His most memorable girlfriends are the 9 Muses. Those are the incredibly beautiful goddesses who create any forms of art.
  • Daily Activities: Well, Apollo has a bunch of jobs. But, his main activities include:
    • Driving the sun chariot, from 5A.M. to 6 P.M. when the sun rises or sets, while singing or writing a song I suppose.
    • Making poetry in his free time
    • Trying out prophecies to mess around someone’s life with a stupid ques
    • Getting girls. (He is a total womanizer), Teenagers nowadays will probably put him as an Ancient Greece equivalent to any One Direction member. That reminds me, if I make a band, I’ll call it the Sons Of Apollo
    • When Helios is taking his job driving the sun chariot (the Greeks got confused between the two being Sun Gods), he probably spends his time making Apollo concerts, playing with his bow and arrow, and probably inventing new medicine.
  • One Sentence Philosophy: The sun literally rises and sets on me!
  • Do I Like Him?: Hmm… Yeah I do! Of course, firstly, as a music fan myself, having a god of Music is just awesome. Apollo is also pretty cool, and like him, I like being in the spotlight! The things I don’t like about him is his narcissism but well, it’s not that bad actually.

Artemis, Goddess Of The Hunt

Artemis, With Her Pet and Bow
  • Powers: OK, she’s got Archery and hunting skills beyond compare. She also has the ability to communicate and summon wildlife.
  • Domain: Hunting, Wildlife, Archery, (She’s better than Apollo), Protection of Women, and The Moon
  • Symbol: The Crescent Moon
  • Sacred Animal: Deer, cause those things are free to roam, like her!
  • Personality: So… Artemis HATES men. Why? I’ll state below, be patient, but her personality generally revolves on her need to defend women, and protecting wildlife. She’s motherly, but she doesn’t want to be a mother. She’s also probably the first ever feminist, and she fights for women rights. Like I stated above, she also doesn’t want to be “chained down” She dislikes the concept of marriage cause of how terrible men treats women back in Ancient Greece.
  • Known Relics/Weapons: Her Silver Bow. Shaped like the crescent moon
  • How Was She Born?:
    See Apollo. But hold on! Before Apollo was born, she was born first, grew immediately to a 6 year old girl, and she helped with Apollo’s birth. After that, she wasted no time watching Apollo’s performance, because she probably got sick of it, Apollo probably spends his time in the womb singing and bragging about himself. That can really get to someone if you’re stuck together nonstop with a flashy, bragging god for 7 months straight.She instead flew to Zeus with Auntie Hestia, asked for some gifts, and permission to never get married. Her gifts are the fact she wants female followers around ages of 6-15, that are still Maidens, and she wanted them to be off limits for mortals and gods. She will teach them to hunt, and called them “The Hunters Of Artemis” Oh and she wants Hunting dogs too. Zeus grants it, cause, rich people loves to make Daddy’s Little Girl(s) happy.
  • Official Spouse: She doesn’t want to get married, or date anyone
  • Daily Activities:
    • She hunts down monsters that no heroes are taking care of, cause Apollo hasn’t prophecized about them being slain by heroes. (way to take care of your brothers mistakes).
    • She protects women, and helps with birth for women around Greece.
    • Oh, and probably she also does demonstrations about women rights like Laborers do when they feel they aren’t paid enough. (Oh wait, this is a different century)
    • Artemis also punishes people who doesn’t care about the environment, and anyone who hunts too much without a single sacrifice? Oh… She’ll destroy you… trust me on that. She once sent a HUGE WILD BOAR to a kingdom for hunting too much without any sacrifices to her. Don’t mess with Artemis, unless you want your family to Arte-miss you (I had to make that pun… sorry)
  • One Sentence Philosophy: Men Are Stupid Brutes!
  • Do I Like Her?: Hmm, I do like her taking care of the environment and fighting for women rights. I don’t like her that much though. She’s pretty cool, and trust me, she is among the nicer gods, and well I haven’t seen her do much things wrong cause of her personal ego. I can’t blame her too much actually for the hate for men, cause look at how much of a jerk the other male gods are.

Hephaestus, The Blacksmith God

Hephaestus, He Doesn’t Seem So Ugly To Me…
  • Powers: The ability to create fire, and immunity to it. Hephaestus also forges the best weapons, shields, jewelries and armors in all of Greece.
  • Domain: He’s the god of Fire, and blacksmithing.
  • Symbol: Hammer, cause he uses them for work.
  • Sacred Animal: Donkeys, cause… well, he’s crippled, but strong. Same goes for Donkeys, donkeys seem to be “crippled”, and clumsy, but they are strong, and still has some uses. Well, I’m clumsy too! (I don’t know about strong, but clumsy? sure)
  • Personality: Well, firstly you might want to read the “How was he born part”, because his personality generally revolves on it, and since I’m following a template and wants to be consistent in the template, I can’t do that. Firstly, Hephaestus is bitter, but his bitter isn’t like Hades’s. Hephaestus feels he just never gets respect. People judge the way he looks much than his gifts. Anyways, Hephaestus also cannot trust anything… He keeps getting betrayed over and over and over since he was born. He is also a hard working man, and he enjoys work, because at least if he is forging things, he can forget the bad things that has happened to him. Luckily he is overall  a nice guy.
  • Known Relics/Weapons: Every single armor every Greek hero has, cause he makes all of the armor for the popular heroes like Hercules, Theseus, Perseus, and Jason. And of course, his Hammer
  • How Was He Born?:
    Hephaestus literally has no daddy. Unlike Theseus who has 2, Hephaestus was born from Hera’s hate to Zeus’s infidelity, which explains his personality in a sense. Because of science, Hephaestus came out being incomplete and err… “Facially Challenged” (OK, ugly…). So, Hera instead of being a proper mother, demonstrated a method of proper throwing.Hera tossed Hephaestus off onto the sea from Mount Olympus, because that’s the way the Goddess of Family life should behave, which at least makes me grateful with Bubi, even though she is moody and can be dangerous in a bad mood, at least she doesn’t toss babies away… Then again, I’m telling stories of a different milLuckily, Hephaestus was caught by a sea nymph named Thetis, however the fall made his incomplete body much more broken, as it crippled one of his legs. As a child, Hephaestus used the undersea volcanoes and used them to forge jewelries for Thetis, and planned his revenge for Hera. That’s a lot of thoughts for a teenager. Thank you world for giving me a low stress life!I could make a bit of a long story here since the childhood part here is until they take their thrones atop Mount Olympus, unfortunately Hephaestus was an adult when that happened. But this is a fun story, and it made Hera suffer which is a nice plot twist for a change, Goddess of making people suffer finally suffers.

    Hephaestus made a special throne of Gold and Jewels for Hera, and when he returned, he gifted her the throne to symbolize him claiming his throne at mount Olympus. Unfortunately, the throne was a trap, and Hera became trapped in it. For a pretty long time Hera whimpered while netted in the throne, and Hephaestus enjoyed his vengeance. Well, until Dionysus, the god of wine convinced him to release Hera. Which was the end of her suffering. Too bad…

  • Official Spouse: Aphrodite, but he gets cheated on a lot, and so does he cheat her, but who cares about these 2.
  • Daily Activities: Working… Pretty much that… He’s a workaholic, spending time making lots of stuffs, like Swords, shields, armor, bows, arrows, thrones, Automatons (also known as Magical Robots), and anything made out of steel that he wants to make.
  • One Sentence Philosophy: I have friends! They’re these robots!
  • Do I Like Him?: Yeah I do, of course, anyone capable of making Hera beg for mercy is okay in my book, but not only that. Hephaestus gets betrayed so often, but he just gets on with it, I mean, he’s probably that character in Greek Mythology that gets the most challenges his entire life, excluding Hercules. He’s a strong willed man, which I totally respect.

Hermes, God Of Messengers

Hermes, Complete With Every One Of His Weapons
  • Powers: He is faster than Sonic! He is also probably Greek’s best trickster. Some poets say he can “outrun time” which according to physics! to travel to the past. But if that is true, than we have ourselves Greek Flash!
  • Domain: Anything involving trickery, (which includes stealing, and bandits), and anything involving travel, (which unfortunately, includes commercials… so now you know who to blame with that catchy commercials sounding over your head). Oh, and also dice… how did he become god of dice? err.. I have no idea.
  • Symbol: His Staff, The Caduceus, see relics and weapons
  • Sacred Animal: Turtle… WHY!? I honestly don’t understand… Hermes isn’t someone to take a deep breath and rest. If it’s a rabbit I’d understand, but turtle!? Eh… read below.
  • Personality: He’s a bit tricky and does things fast. But, he still likes taking time to plan things, and the only reason he does things fast is cause of how busy he is. He also has lots of tricks up his sleeve to get the better end of any bargain, and he is a heck of a liar. Every trick in the book? Hermes wrote that. He is sneaky in a sense, but he’s a good guy. Kinda… I’m not sure. He’s all sorts of confusing.
  • Known Relics/Weapons: The Caduceus staff, a herald’s staff with 2 snakes around it. His winged sandals, and a sword. Oh, his Caduceus staff can also be used to hypnotize people…
  • How Was He Born?:
    OK… So, he’s a son of Zeus, WOW! what a surprise! His mom was Maia, Titan of… one of Atlas’s daughters. She’s possibly Zeus’s typical girlfriend. Pretty, without much of personality. Anyways, Maia gave birth to Hermes with a low profile. She gave birth in a cave at nighttime to hide from Hera, cause she learned pretty well after Leto’s incident. After Hermes was born, Maia nursed him and made sure baby Hermes fell asleep. After he fell asleep, Maia fell asleep too.Hermes woke up the second his mom fell asleep, and for some reason, chose to not grow up cause he wants to be a baby thief. Wait? first thing he did after he was born was steal? Yeah, kinda odd, but okay… Anyways, remember that Apollo was also the God of Cattle herding? Hermes knew about that, and he wants some cows! So, he found where it was hidden, and stole 50 of em. He also made a bunch of fake footsteps so people who saw them would think the Cows walked from the beach and just followed the footsteps of a baby. Hermes ate 1 of them, and sacrificed one for the gods.Then… Hermes did whatever anyone who commited a crime to Apollo should do! Invent a new instrument! He killed a turtle, used it’s shell and used some of the leftover muscles of the cows and invented the first ever Lyre, Apollo’s favorite instrument (as of now, back then it was just invented)!Hermes hid the cows in a different cave and went back to his mommy, before she woke up. Anyways, Apollo woke up the next morning and counted his cattle, and BAM! 50 were missing. Apollo checked the footprints, and saw baby steps and cows following them. Apollo wondered what kind of a baby could possibly do this. Since Baby Apollo sang after he was born in an instant, and Baby Ares broke Zeus’s finger, so Baby gods should be capable of these stuffs. So, he kinda asked for some news about the latest baby god births. Well, Apollo found out about Maia giving birth to Hermes. He found him, and asked him about the cows. Well, he lied, but Apollo felt convinced he stole the cows… I don’t really know why…

    He took Hermes to his (and Hermes’s) father, Zeus for some punishments. Apollo demanded that Hermes must be punished for stealing his cattle. Well, anyways, Zeus said Hermes must pay any price Apollo demands, cause he’s probably too lazy to choose a real punishment. Well, here is where the Lyre comes in! He played the Lyre, caused Apollo to fall in love with it, and traded out Apollo’s cattle for it. Also, since he is a god on bargaining stuff, he got every single one of his relics stated above as a bonus! Wow, Hermes, nice manipulation of one’s personality! Oh, and one more thing… Remember kids, don’t steal!

  • Official Spouse: He isn’t married to anyone… but he does date lots of people. So, single people that are busy, even Hermes can find his love life, with his insanely busy schedule. Don’t use work as an excuse! 😀
  • Daily Activities: Oh boy… Okay, so here are Hermes’s activities
    • Delivering Zeus’s packages as his personal courier using Hermes Express, Olympus’s very own courier and delivery system! If you believe the fact Hermes can outrun time, he must deliver these stuff faster than you ordered them.
    • Guiding souls to the underworld using Underworld Touring cause Hades can’t do that
    • Doing Zeus’s stealing and dirty work, I guess that’s his favorite part of the job
    • Helping quests for some heroes by delivering them relics for their adventures and quests
    • Probably running an online E-Commerce known as Olympedia, with the Caduceus staff as a mascot!
  • One Sentence Philosophy: Hermes Express! Receive Today, What You Order Tomorrow!
  • Do I Like Him?: Hmm…. I can’t say why, but I’ve always liked Hermes when I look at him, and his statues. Plus, he’s basically the Greek God equivalent of The Flash, my favorite Superhero, so why not?

Dionysus, God Of Wine

Dionysus, Probably Posing For A Party
  • Powers: Growing grapes, making wine, creating food, and making people insane…
  • Domain: Wine, Theater, Partying, Revelry
  • Symbol: Thrysus, a staff with a pine cone on top.
  • Sacred Animal: Leopard, he likes them cause he thinks those are graceful, I guess… Anyways, Dionysus began the trend of wearing a leopard skin coat.
  • Personality: He… Gets drunk and doesn’t even give a care about the world when he is performing his “rituals”. He also enjoys art, and doesn’t care a bit about work, he’s that guy who says, Drink! BE MERRY! Tomorrow You May DIE! So Enjoy LIFE! He doesn’t care about being busy, as he basically “buys” (read: creates) the food of his followers, and as long as you worship him, you’ll get fed. On that note, I’d probably say that Dionysus is the equivalent of Apollo that gets drunk, and doesn’t work as hard as Apollo.
  • Known Relics/Weapons: Thrysus, like his symbol
  • How Was He Born?:
    Ok this is a bit tricky. Zeus is his dad, (like every Olympian who isn’t one of his siblings) and Dionysus was born a demigod, but became a god eventually, anyways… Zeus dated a girl in Thebes known as Semele, who was basically the prettiest princess of her generation. Cause Zeus’s taste is pretty easy to guess… Pretty! Semele was pregnant with Zeus’s baby (who became Dionysus)Hera visited Thebes and convinced Semele to force Zeus into showing him his true form… Which literally burns mortals. Zeus did it because he already swore on the River Styx (which is an oath you CANNOT break, unless you want the spirit of hate, to hate you…). So Semele is now burned, but the baby? Survived! Hanging in midair cause… Greek Logic… Zeus cut open his thigh and put the baby there to grow, giving the baby a temporal womb.Once born, Zeus cut open his thigh, and gave the baby to Hermes, naming him Bacchus for now (which is Dionysus’s Roman name too!), and told Hermes to give the baby to Semele’s older sister, and forcing her to treat Bacchus as his own son.Bacchus’s childhood is a LONG story, because Hermes came up with a few tricks for Semele’s sister to take care of him without having Hera catching them. Anyways, after Hera found out about the baby Bacchus, when Bacchus was 8, she drove Semele’s sister and husband to madness, causing them to leap off a cliff, while carrying their actual children. Cause Hera just gives a great example of family life and showing love right?

    This can go on and on and on, because he gained the title Dionysus as a child, and invented wine as a child too, but I’ll cut it here.

  • Official Spouse: Ariadne… Read Theseus’s story, cause he saved Ariadne, and made her his immortal wife.
  • Daily Activities: PARTY!
  • One Sentence Philosophy: What’s Work?
  • Do I Like Him?: NOPE NOPE NOPE!!! There is nothing to like about a god who spends his time being drunk, and partying… “But Azriel…” Shush! I don’t want to hear anything about supporting Dionysus! NA AH

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